Published 2013-01-14 16:25 by Abscissa in General
Claiming that nostalgia is the sole appeal of retro and retro-style games is like claiming The Three Stooges are funny purely because of nostalgia.
We grown-ups enjoy retro games because they're fun. And they look good. And they don't let cinematic bullshit get in the way of the real game. And again, they're fun.
Published 2013-01-06 14:32 by Abscissa in General
Just want to share a little lesson I learned the hard way:
When you purchase titles from the PlayStation online store, especially PlayStation Plus Free Games (ie, the "Instant Game Collection"), try to keep each game as a separate transaction. That is, don't go to "Continue Shopping" and then get another game. Actually go through the "Checkout" first, and then get whatever else you want. It's less convenient, but it's worthwhile because if you ever unlucky enough to have to deal with Sony's customer support, it will make it harder for them to screw up even more and cause more problems which they will refuse to fix. This can and does happen. You should be protected from it.
Case in point:
The PlayStation Plus subscription includes a seemingly nifty little benefit called an "Instant Game Collection". This is like Netflix for PS3 and Vita games: At any given time, there are a bunch of full, non-demo, non-limited, games available for free download, free to play. Over time, some titles will rotate out of availability, and others will rotate in. However, according to Sony's own statements, as long as you're a PlayStation Plus subscriber (even if your subscription ended and was then reinstated) you are entitled to re-download, for free, at any time, any "Instant Game Collection" game that you've already downloaded and deleted even after it's rotated out of availability.
However, if you don't protect yourself, Sony will screw you over by failing to honor their own obligation to you. They have already done so to me.
What happened:
After subscribing to PlayStation Plus, I downloaded a few of the free Instant Game Collection games, including Bioshock 2, as well as a Timed Trial of Splinter Cell: Double Agent (The Timed Trial games entitle you to 60 minutes of the full game. Naturally, these are games that are not available as part of the Instant Game Collection.) I obtained these as part of the same transaction, by using "Continue Shopping" instead of doing a "Checkout" after every individual game (which, in retrospect, I should have done instead).
Then, the 60 minute Timed Trial expired after only allowing me about five, maybe ten, minutes of running the game (including cutscenes, loading screens, company logos, etc.) So naturally I called Sony support.
Sony's support informed me that that was indeed something that incorrectly went wrong, and they also informed me that the 60 minutes do NOT need to be consecutive. They promised to fix it and email me within a few weeks.
About a week later, I got an email claiming that the problem was fixed. Not only was it NOT fixed, it gets worse: Sony's trained chimps had attempted to fix the problem by canceling the transaction that included the Timed Trial game. They had canceled the ENTIRE transaction - including the free Instant Game Collection games...including Bioshock 2 which, by then, had already rotated out of availability.
This means that Bioshock 2 is no longer in my download list as it is supposed to be, and therefore, if I need to delete it from my hard drive (it takes up a whopping 10 GB), then I will not be able to redownload it as I'm entitled to do.
After another call to Sony's support chimps, a referral a different phone number with a different set of Sony support chimps, and a bunch of hold time with intolerable elevator music (naturally), I was told that they could not fix the issues with either of the games. They provided no remedy other than to say "Sorry".
Fortunately, I'm not a big fan of Bioshock, and the PS3 version of Splinter Cell: Double Agent has been said to run very poorly (not that I would know). But a major multinational corporation failing to honor their own obligations to their own customers is inexcusable.
Naturally, I will continue calling them about the matter, but in the meantime, I'll be damned if I'm going to keep the matter private.
And again, if you download things from the PlayStation store, help protect yourself and keep every game separate.
Published 2012-09-29 13:18 by Abscissa in General
...Because a good workman knows the difference between the right tool and a piece of shit.
Oh sure, a good carpenter could use a damn saw to drive a nail. But only a lousy carpenter would try. And only a bad manager would expect him to.
Now I'm all for personal responsibility and whatnot. And I know that handing a professional tool to an idiot monkey probably won't get you good results. But when a someone's expected to do a job with a shitty tool, or simply the wrong tool, and the results suck...well then let's cut the crap and put the blame where it belongs: On the tool, and on the idiot who chose it.
Perhaps more importantly, let's quit abusing trite sayings to rationalize idiocy.
And speaking of bad tools: Anecdotal appeals to accomplishment do not demonstrate a tool doesn't suck. (I'm looking at you, PHP apologists.)
Published 2012-09-13 00:52 by Abscissa in General
Apple has successfully solidified the *cough*legitimacy of software patents. Welcome to 1984. Who needs SOPA to destroy freedom when we have Apple?
I take back what I said about Steve Jobs. I'm glad the fucker's finally a rotting corpse. What I'm not glad about is that 1. It took so goddamn long for the bastard to die, 2. He didn't suffer more, and 3. The rest of Apple is still allowed to live freely after blatantly murdering any last chance of true freedom.
Any Apple employee with any shred of moral integrity would be jumping ship by now. Any who choose remain, for any rationalization, are now necessarily every bit as evil as Jobs was. And that's a hell of a lot.
And no, this is not any form of threat, you dumb shits.
The only good that could come of this is that Android might actually be forced to be less of a piece of shit by aping fewer of Apple's retarded ideas. But this total corruption of the formerly free world is far too high a price for such a trivial win.
R.I.P. Justice and Freedom: Died August 2012, not at the hands of terrorists, but at the hands of Apple, all thanks to the personal grudge of a dead CEO.
I hope you iWhores all choke to death on your phones. We have all of you to thank for this mess, after all.
Published 2012-09-03 19:49 by Abscissa in General
Supper: It's like "dinner", except annoying.
Crazy: "Crazy" is not an adverb. When you use it as one (ex: "You language butchers are crazy stupid"), you sound like a moron. Which you clearly are if you use "crazy" as an adverb, but that doesn't mean I want to hear about it. I know it's just a fantasy, but sometimes I like to pretend I'm not surrounded by idiots. Hearing people advertise their stupidity via gross misuse of "crazy" makes it difficult to maintain that blissful delusion.
Sopping: As if just hearing the word wasn't grating enough, what does it even mean? It certainly can't mean "wet" because then "sopping wet" would be redundant. You wouldn't be saying something that pointlessly redundant, would you? Fortunately, nobody born after 1960 actually uses this word.
Cloud (except as water vaper): The word you're looking for, dumbfuck, is "Internet".
Tween: The word you're looking for is "preteen". "Tween" is an animation term. No, it can't mean both - because I said so. And I say so because you already have "preteen" - use it.
Ibibyte: If you kids these days really want your goofy SI-imitating "bytes", you can go call them "decimal bytes" (as in 5MB10). And I'll call mine "binary bytes" (5MB2). Hell, write them as 5MB10 and 5MB2 if you must. But ibibytes can fuck off.
PostgreSQL: How the hell am I supposed to pronounce this?!? (Yea, yea, I know, but still...)
SQL: "Sequel" (ironically) was its predecessor. Stop calling it "sequel".
Synergy: What is this, an MBA convention?
"Acrosst": "Across" has no "t". So why are you pronouncing one? My fourth grade teacher used to say this. All the damn time. Fuck, I hated her.
"Heighth": "Height" does not end in "th". Nobody around you pronounces it "th". So why are you pronouncing it "th"? Yes, I've actually heard people consistently pronounce it like this. (Is this possibly a Pittsburgh thing? Like "wush", "warsh" and "ruoin"?)
Anything ending in "-izzle": It began stillborn, and now...even as a joke it's painfully old. Can we please just let it finally die?
Pwned: Just...let...it...die.
Pr0n: Is it delightful porn or delicious seafood? Stop confusing me!
Published 2012-07-23 17:46 by Abscissa in General
Clearly, he had C++ in mind when he wrote this song. I mean, really:
"No reflection. No reflection. I've got no reflection."
What else could he have meant? C++ is known for lacking many modern features: modules, closures, reference types, fast compilation, etc. Manson, of course, is zeroing in on reflection here.
Other lyrics in the song allude more generally to C++'s pitfalls and the frustration and agony of using it, particularly without the help of static analysis tools like Coverity:
"You don't even want to know what I'm gonna do to you."
"Show myself how to make a noose
A gun's cliche, and a razor too
I'm not a deathshare vacation, vacant station
Made of scars and filled with my old wounds."
"This'll hurt you worse than me.
I'm weak, seven days a week."
That last line is particularly interesting. Scholars will no doubt debate for centuries whether Manson was referring to C++'s type system (in particular the aspects inherited from C), or making a general statement about the quality of the language's overall design. Personally, I suspect the answer is "both", given Manson's penchant for double meanings: "You're a little pistol and I'm fucking pistol whipped" ("Pistol Whipped"), "I've got an 'F' and a 'C', and I got a 'K', too. And the only thing that's missing is a bitch like 'U'." ("(s)AINT").
The song's video alludes to C++ as well. As any refugee from C++ to modern languages is likely to have noticed, C++ is stuck in the 70's. But instead of demonstrating this with the straightforward choice of leisure suits, Manson exaggerates the anachronism by using what appears to be closer to the 1770's, rather than the 1970's as one would expect.