All OSes Suck

Published 2013-09-21 20:49 by Abscissa in Reviews

Windows: Proprietary. Can't decide on a UI and tries to force everyone onboard through every crazy short-lived UI blunder. Plus it still doesn't always "just work".

Linux: Offers five thousand choices for everything, none of them well-polished.

OSX: Expensive, straight-jacketed, proprietary and often overlooked by third parties.

Ubuntu Unity: Goofy OSX clone with even fewer options. Really just Linux.

BSD: Expert-only Linux-ish with minimal third party support.

Plan 9: Minimal uptake, and therefore irrelevant.

BeOS: Effectively dead and irrelevant.

Amiga: Effectively dead and irrelevant.

OS/2: Long since dead and irrelevant.

Solaris/QNX: Newly dead and still irrelevant.

NeXTSTEP/IRIX: Also dead and irrelevant.

Haiku/Minix/Hurd: Alive and irrelevant.

Chrome OS: A web browser as an OS. Are you fucking kidding me?

iOS: It's freaking iOS for godssakes.

Android: It's freaking iOS with a system-level VM for godssakes.

CyanogenMod: Android sans straight-jacketing.

Blackberry 10: Proprietary straight-jacketing and minimal third part support.

Windows Phone 8: Proprietary straight-jacketing, minimal third part support and butt-ugly.

Windows Phone Pre-8: Effectively dead and irrelevant.

WebOS: Undead and irrelevant.

PalmOS: I love it. But it's outdated, abandoned, and therefore useless. Graffiti v2 sucked - thanks Xerox.

MeeGo: Replaced by Taizen.

Bada: Replaced by Taizen.

Taizen: Nearly at 3.0 and you still can't obtain it. Encourages HTML5 as an applications platform, presumably as some sort of sick joke.

Symbian: A flip-phone OS isn't exactly much of an OS. Did anybody ever know there was a smartphone version? No matter, it's dead now.

All that said, I still use both Windows and Linux, I intend to get an Android/CyanogenMod device again, and there's some others I'm keeping an eye on. Obviously most OSes have their good points, too. And I'll use what I need to, when I need to, if I need to, and bitch as much as I damn well choose to. Still, that doesn't mean OSes don't all suck anyway.